Tuesday, April 02, 2013

Why Run?

This freaking hill kills me every time.
Hence why the dance moves busted out here this morning.

OK - here's the dead honest truth. I am the worst runner on the planet. WORST. I have no discipline. On any given day, at any given moment, I can come up with at least 43,782 things to do OTHER than go for a run. 

Like organize my nail polish into rainbow order. 
Or clean the burnt crumbs out of the bottom of the toaster.
Maybe fold the Mount Everest of socks that has sat on top of my dryer for 6 months.
Get a pap smear. Go to the dentist. Pay bills.
All those things become REALLY IMPORTANT when I have a free minute to workout. 

But since I'm being dead honest, I have to admit that what usually happens with those free minutes has nothing to do with polish, crumbs, mountains, bills or appointments. What usually happens is I make a bed or two and load and unload a few appliances (so as not to feel too guilty) and then plop down with a book. Face it. I'm a nerd with a flabby ass. 

But you see, since I'm being dead honest, I also have to admit that I actually really LOVE it when I make the decision to run. It's just really hard for me to stay motivated. My sister in law sent me an article last week titled "9 Reasons Running Doesn't SUCK As Much As You Think." It cracked me up and I have to share. I've decided to try and focus each week on a new reason why I love running. If I focus on all these fun, good, awesome things more...then running will not seem like a chore, right? The choice to go run will be easy. Joyful! I'll crave it like I do picking up a book, right? Well, that's the plan anyway. 

This list is an awesome start (and exactly my sense of humor) but feel free to speak up and help add to it! You know I need all the help I can get when I have 43,782 other books errrr...I mean, things nagging at me to put them first. 

9 Reasons Running Doesn't Suck as Much as You Think...

with my own two cents added in red. of course. i can't not add my own two cents.
1. You can lose weight by drinking nothing but hot water with lemon. Or you can run for an hour, treat yourself to a cookie and still fit into your skinny jeans. One of these options makes you bitchy; the other makes you rad.
Tessa. Since I'm not a sweets person, I use this reasoning for gin and cheese too.

2. Take your iPod with you, and your runs suddenly become a safe place to indulge your love of boy-band music. With enough practice, you can even blend in a couple dance moves from ‘Bye Bye Bye’. Don’t lie: You’ve still got that routine memorized.
And you don't have to censor your R-rated lyric listening. When Nicki Minaj sings about being "higher than a motherf#$%&er" you totally sympathize thanks to your lack of oxygen inhalation combined with your steep hill ascension. 

3. When your boss, your melodramatic friend and your nagging to-do list won’t leave you alone, calmly put on your running shoes and head out the door. They won’t follow you. It’s a safer alternative to storming out with both middle fingers in the air (though you can -and should- still do this in your head, just for spectacular effect).
This is also where the R-rated lyric listening comes in handy, no? And probably where the term "Pounding the Pavement" comes from. As in "I better go pound some pavement before I pound your face." 

4. You’ll discover Lululemon pants are good for more than just buying tampons and Cheez-its at Target (I know, ladies. My world was rocked with that discovery, too).
Let's just take a moment to let that sink in. Actually working out in your workout clothes. People do that. 

5. Running is the last place you have to “be a lady.” Sweat, snot and sneaking behind a bush to pee is not only liberating it’s fun, in that giggly-childish-naughty kind of way.
And we all know I worry all day long about "being a lady." 

6. Getting a run in before happy hour means you get tipsy on half a glass of wine instead of your usual two. That’s not being a lush, that’s just sound economic planning.
This might be the single most best reason I should run ever. Cause I'm broke. And I'm not a lightweight. 

7. Studies have shown that runners have better sex. Sex counts as a cross-training workout, which in turn makes you a better runner, which – hello! – leads to even better sex. Really, the whole thing is full of win-wins.
This is probably as close as I'll ever get to trying Cross Fit so I think I should at least give it a whirl. 

8. Girls are lucky; there’s an entire industry committed to making us look awesome while getting our sweat on. Workout clothes come in all sorts of cool colors and designs. Jockstraps, on the other hand, will always be ugly with questionable stains.
I'm sorry. I can't help it. I just keep imagining a whole wall of neon Jockstraps at Target. The Bike brand is dropping the ball. 

9. Non-runners will sit on the couch and call you crazy. Those folks, sadly, will never learn what their bodies are capable of. You, on the other hand, will die knowing you completely, totally, unabashedly used up the body that was loaned to you. That’s not crazy. That’s freakin’ awesome.
It's true. I've done it. I'm a firm believer you can push/train your body to do anything. You just have to DO IT. 

Tell me. Please!!


HaleyV6 said...

Every part of this is amazeballs.

Especially your added RED!!

I run so that I can keep up with my kids. I never want to be "that" mom that can't play in the back yard with the kiddos. I want them to try and keep up with me and then pass me some day.

everydaymomma said...

I love this! Especially 3 I need a good reason to listen to the music I'm not allowed to listen to with the kids;)

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